My horrible experience watching “When the Bough Breaks”

I mean what the entire fuck.  The movie was awful, but what I do remember is the ringing in my ear after another gay man yelled next to me at ear drum breaking volumes.

So I decided to go to North Dekalb Mall AMC because it is on the way home from where I work and close to where I live.  Tell me why the fuck did I do that.

So I get there and I get my ticket and go to my seat.  I wanted to sit in the middle.  I wanted to sit not to close to anyone or too far.  I’m just weird like that.  So the theatre becomes mildly pack.  That’s ok. So a skinny (DL) man and his lady friend sits to the left of me and this elderly woman sits to the right of me and puts her purse right next to me.  Again, I am making sure people understand I don’t want anyone sitting next to me.

Well anyways, there were these three black gay guys who sat behind me the entire movie.  Along with them came a woman and her crying baby.  The problem is, the baby never stops crying and cooing.  I grew up in the black church and I was use to black babies crying while you are trying to pay attention to something.  That is my experience not a judgement.

So while the movie is progressing you have the three gay guys behind me just doing the absolute most.

“That’s tea”

“YOSSS”

“AHHHONEY”

It is getting so irritating that the guy at the end of the aisle to the right of me is literally grunting after every thing they say.  And they say a lot during the movie.  Their voices were growing deeper and louder after every scene.  Towards the last 20 minutes of the movie they get the loudest and deepest.  They literally screamed so loud that they left my ears ringing.  (Mind you they are hitting the back of my chair with their knock-kneed having behinds).

At this point I am ready to fight these gay guys.  It would be four faggots turning the heck up.  Now there is only one of me and three of them.  I don’t know what size they are or how much they lift, but baby is ready to fight.  The kid arises and it was going down. I may be my ass kicked, but that’s ok.

I pull my phone out and say to myself, “Carter, if they hit you, let’s just make sure that we fight in a way that won’t send us to jail.  It is Friday.”  Yes, I am that crazy.  So they do not touch me or throw things at me to my knowledge.  But I am still mad as hell.

After that weak ass ending at the movies, there comes I to confront them.  I turn around and lock eyes with the loudest one.  And to my surprise, there are three skinny knock-kneed women or girls staring jarringly back at me..  I stare in amazement for three seconds.  I am angry, surprised, and in awe.  Awanprised!!!!  So I just turn to the elderly woman who motioning me to go on bye.

So I stomp out the movie theatre trying not to push people out my way.  Trying to look like I am normal, but I think the cave beast know.  People don’t look at me in the eye.  I make it to my car and start my review.  All three attempts end up in a rant where my black feminism is challenged.

I refuse to upload those videos and will evaluate why I could call those women all that in anger.  I was not just mad at them, but the other 5 percent.

I do not want to hear about black theatres and black people and that’s how black people act.  BULLSHIT!!! I’ve been around black people my ENTIRE LIFE!!  These were fucking assholes from the pits of hell.  That’s all they are.  ATL MOVIES or MAGIC JOHNSON THEATRE (in the later years of business) would have kicked them out and me out for being close to them.  These are the exceptions.

These are the family members you do not invite to fancy events.  The dudes you date, but never take out.  While I may sound classist and egregious, I want to argue that I, along with the other 95 percent of the members in the audience paid our 6.41 to watch this crappy movie in peace.  I have been where they are at.  The commentary by those gay-bait hollering assholes behind me was not even adding to the movie experience.  Where did y’all purchase these sayings?

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I literally asked myself am I watching the same movie.  Their reactions were bullshit.  That movie was bullshit.  I am now at home ENJOYING myself watching movies from Redbox.

 

Moral of story???

Go to Atlantic Station next time all you get is a few obnoxious comments from crazy drugged up frat boys.

 

What makes it worse is that I may have actually enjoyed the movie had it not been for the 5% that was trying to outdo the movie.

Let me know what you think?

Have you had this experience?

 

cmortalx